You never know when you will have an impact on someone’s life…
By Melissa Cook: My Crazy Life As A Trucker’s Wife
As I’m sitting outside the doctor’s office this afternoon with one of my daughters, I notice that in the same building there is a couples class gathering. Apparently, in the state of Florida, you have to take a class before getting divorced. Yea, that’s JUST what I wanted to do– sit at the same table for 3 hours with the man I am about to cut out of my life!!
Anyway, the women were taking breaks 1st. I hear them complaining, and being I am naturally nosy by heart, I get closer for the scoop.
I am divorced and since remarried to my wonderful husband. My ex is a good man. I grew up, he didn’t, so we went our separate ways. Here’s where it gets interesting… These women were complaining about these men like they were the worse people in the world!
“He works too much which led to my affair,” or “We just want different things” (when asked how long she was married… 6 months) or, and my personal favorite, “He’s a great father just not attentive to me”.
Now, with me being a truckers wife I am use to him “working too late” and I’ve yet and never will have an affair, as well as him not being attentive because he is not there! I couldn’t handle it anymore and had to say something.
Me: “Would you all be offended if I say a few words?”
Them: “No, go right ahead!”
Me: “I don’t understand how you all can sit out here and degrade your husbands, the men you married for better or for worse, for richer or poorer… YOU complain that your husband is working all the time to support your family and you are having an affair… SHAME ON YOU! He’s WORKING!!!!! And YOU!! You’ve only been married 6 months and you already want different THINGS?? How different could they get in 180 days?? And how could you complain that he’s not attentive? Have you tried yourself to spark up your romance? Probably not. Trust me ladies. If this is the only thing they are guilty of why divorce them? They sound like good men.”
As I start to walk away I hear one of them say “Shes probably not even married!”
I turned around and quickly snapped back ” As a matter a fact I AM married. We used to take each other for granted as well like you all did until he started driving a truck over the road. I only get to see him 3-5 days out of each month so I have to be both husband, wife, mother, chaperone, personal assistant and so forth. I have to say goodnight from a phone, blow kisses instead of giving them, cuddle with my pillow with his T-shirt covering it so I feel closer to him. Why don’t you try being a wife instead of sitting here bitching about how rotten your marriage is due to your husbands. Maybe it’s you and not them. Think about it.”
I walked back into the doctor’s office. 45 minutes later I came out and one of the couples was waiting for me. They thanked me and decided to go to couples therapy instead of divorce.
We trucker wives, girlfriends and significant others are strong cookies. Don’t ever be afraid to speak your mind. You never know who might just be paying attention.