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The Worst Ways to Die

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If you’re a man, we’re pretty sure this is one of the last ways you’d like to go.

A Chinese man died last week when a woman squeezed his testicles until he collapsed. The 41-year-old woman was trying to park her scooter in front of a store in the Hainan Province, when the store’s owner came refused to let her park.

The woman became irate.  As the confrontation escalated, the woman called her husband and brother, who came to her aid.

The group got into a physical altercation.  Then, the woman grabbed the store owner’s family jewels and put the squeeze on and didn’t let go until the store owner collapsed.

The victim was transported to the hospital where he died as a result of his injuries.

According to Ugo, these are 5 of the  worst ways to die:

1. Bladder burst- Okay, we all know you truckers have to “hold it” for long periods of time, but have you ever felt like you might burst? It happened to Danish astronomer Tycho Brathe.  In those days, it was considered rude to excuse yourself,  so Tycho sat, legs crossed, and held in his pee until pop! His bladder burst, leaking toxins into his body. He died 11 days later.

2. Suffocated by trash– Legendary pack-rats the Collyer brothers were suffocated under piles of trash in their uptown 5th Avenue house, when piles  newspapers, books, furniture and more, collapsed in on them. In 1947, the cops got tipped off to a funky smell and found both Collyers buried under literally 100 tons of trash.

3. Stuck in a windshield- In 2001, homeless Texan Gregory Biggs was struck by a car driven by a drunk Chawnte Dawn Mallard. Biggs was lodged in her windshield and severely injured, but not dead. So what did Mallard do?  He drove home with the guy still stuck in the glass, parked in her garage and let him die, coming out from time to time to apologize for hitting him. Biggs eventually died of his injuries and Mallard got put in jail for 50 years.

4. Being Cannibalized- German native Bernd-Jurgen Brandes answered a classified ad taken out by Arwin Meiwes that stated he was looking for someone to kill and then eat.  The pair met up and Meiwes killed and ate him. Would that be assisted suicide?

5. Blazing Barrel Death- Travis Rilat and Tyson Perez should have taken more science classes. The two poured 4 gallons of methanol alcohol into a 55- gallon barrel, climbed into it and lit it.  The two thought the barrel would shoot out the back and send them on a ride.  Instead, the barrel blew up, killing Perez and badly burning Rilat.

What do you think, drivers? Which of the six deaths were the worst way to go?

 

 

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